HELLO TO MY SUBSCRIBERS!!! Its been a while!
Ryan and I arrived semi-safely on Monday (July 14th) at about 9pm (well, thats what time we got into Spencer, Indiana). We had many interesting conversations on the way back, which was really nice. We talked about politics and religion, and Ryan asked me many questions about my beliefs on certain things. It was really nice.
We were almost killed twice on the way here (though Ryan says that is a little melodramatic on my part). The first time we almost died we were in Arkansas (btw, why is it pronounced Are-can-saw? Why not Are-can-sis?!). We were going about 90 miles per hour (which was 10 miles over the speed limit of 80mph) and this car cuts us off (without using a turn signal) and brakes. We almost hit them, and at the angle we would've hit, Ryan and I would've spun and crashed into the semi next to us. You can use your imagination to figure out what would've happened then. The second time we were in Missouri (I hate Missouri, btw) and this van cuts us off without a signal and we almost hit her. I was actually on the phone talking to Fawn when this happened.
But we lived and made it to Indiana. It was a very long trip.
My mother didn't like my hair at first. Though she is getting used to it now. Every day a little more pink and purple wash out and it turns more blonde. I promise that the pictures will be up soon!! I have to steal Ryan's phone so that I can download the pics.
I've barely had any time to settle in since I've gotten here. My week has gone like this:
Tuesday: I went with Mom, Hannah, Chris and Chris' friends, Donnie and Jaime to the Monroe County Library. Where we dropped Chris, Donnie and Jaime off for an Anime Convention. Later we had my coming home/Chris' 18th birthday party at the Mall. Then we went to a Mexican Restuarant, El Nortena, to play chess.
Wednesday: I spent the day with Sarah Jo and her new boyfriend (well, her first real boyfriend), Stephen, walking around Bloomington.
Thursday and Friday: I worked.
Saturday (Sabbath): I went to church and spent the day with Sarah Jo, Stephen, Ethan, Nathan, Andrew and Sonya. We also went (as a youth group) to visit my friend, John. He was in a major car accident recently and we went to see him. He broke his leg and a finger, he was pretty banged up when we saw him. One of his friends was killed in the accident.
and Sunday: I went with Mom, Chris, Hannah, Donnie and Donnie's Sister to play chess again. Also so that my mother could introduce me to a young gentleman (Yes, my mom is trying to set me up with someone). I played 3 games total; two against my mom and one against another gentleman. I'm rather rusty, so I lost all three. The young gentleman's name is Jimmy and he is in 5 bands (he apparently plays guitar, drums and keyboard). And he is half Korean. I think thats why mom wanted to set me up with him, because I seem to be solely enamoured with Asian men of recent.
Thats how busy I've been!! And this week I'm going to be even busier!!
Today (Monday): I have worked.
Tuesday: I work
Wednesday: I work
Thursday: I work.
Friday: I'm supposed to hang out with JD
Sabbath: I'm supposed to go to church and meet Amish people (per Ethan's request)
and Sunday: I'm supposed to play chess again.
Updates:
My mom now has 2 jobs!! She is working at Chamber's Smorgasbord (in Spencer) and Indiana University (in Bloomington). She just got the job at IU, she had the interview on Thursday. Thursday is also the day that everything began going incredibly wrong!!
While I was at work on Thursday (July 17th) and mom was in her interview with IU, a message was left on our answering machine saying that Wes, my step-father, had been awarded custody of Hannah. The reason, apparently, is because of my mom's depression (which is discrimination, by the way). Not only that, but for a while, Wes was trying to make my mom pay HIM Child Support!! Isn't that unbelievable?! He doesn't want to pay for his child, but he wants to force my mom to. Luckily, the court said she didn't have to because at the time she didn't have a job.
Thankfully it isn't over. Because the divorce hasn't been finalized my mom still has a chance to present her side of the story and get Hannah back. Prayer would be much appreciated in this matter!
So Thursday was bad. Then Friday got worse. On Friday, Wes came over to drop off liscence plates and money he owed mom for said plates. Mom went to go and take Chris to summer school and while she was gone, Wes went to the leasing office and renewed the apartment's lease. For himself. So when mom went over to renew the lease she found that out. We were then told that we have to be out by July 31st, making us officially homeless. The good news is that Whomever controls this universe decided that they like us and has sent people to our rescue. People have offered us housing and other necessities to help us until things get settled out.
Then on Saturday, Hannah was supposed to spend the night with her friend, Maddie. Mom was working at Chambers and I was at Church. Wes went over to Maddie's and told Maddie's mom that he has custody of Hannah and that he is taking her to his house. He then proceeds to tell her that he will bring her back the next night for her to baby-sit so that he can start his new work shift (10:30pm to 6:30am). He didn't call mom or discuss any of this with her at all. Though the paperwork said that they were supposed to discuss some kind of a transition for Hannah. Maddie says that Hannah was very upset when Wes picked her up and seemed unwilling to go with him.
On Sunday, Mom took some of Hannah's things to her so that she would have some of her stuff. When I saw her she seemed to be withdrawn and upset. She acted like she did when she was little. When she was younger she would cling to me and not want me to go places if she was upset. She sat on my lap and hugged onto my neck like the world was about to end.
Because we were over at Wes' house (in Spencer) I saw him. I asked him what he thought of my hair. His response was "Its hair". I said that it was much different from when I left. About 10 minutes passed and he askes, "How much did it cost?"
Prayer that Hannah doesn't revert back to not eating (like she did when her grandfather died) would be much appreciated as well. We almost lost her that time, I don't want her to go through that again.
Everything, as you can tell, is just in a general uproar here.
I keep listening to "Utakata" by Kagrra, and its making me homesick. Except I have no idea where home is. I feel homeless, even though I currently have a place to live. I have a house, but no home. "Utakata" is home to me, I guess.
I know it could just be me, but I feel so messed up right now. I have tried to listen to Gackt (usually his songs make me feel better), I tried to think about how awesome my pants are going to be when they are done, I try to stay busy (which isn't hard here), but I keep coming back to two emotions: Homesickness and Loneliness.
I miss Fawn and Arlin, I miss my Memere, I miss people who have never spoken/written to me, but read my blogs. I'm homesick for the ocean, I'm homesick for Japan (which makes the least amount of sense to me considering that I've never been there!), I'm homesick for when the times I felt at home here in Indiana. So many emotions that make no sense to me!! I'm homesick for a place to call home and, surrounded by people, I'm completely alone.
Then there is my health which has hit a downward spiral. My iron levels are extremely low, I'm actually really worried about it. Why are my iron levels low, you may ask? Well, lets just say that you don't want to know. Not only that, but I fell the other day (July 16th) and almost broke my knee cap. Instead I scrapped my hands, hurt my shoulder, scrapped my left knee all to hell and scrapped my chest. Concrete does not a good cushion make.
Everything that could go wrong does go wrong perfectly describes the situation here.
I am really in the mood to watch "Battle Royale 2" or "Ju-on: The Grudge 2", but neither of them are with me. They are both with Fawn! Oh well.
You know what hurts the most about this whole messed up situation? The fact that Wes didn't care enough to call me back (I left him a message on Monday when I got to my Mom's house) to ask about my trip. He said he was to busy to call. He is such a liar.
I'm tired of his bullshit. Its not worth it anymore. After I speak my peace (which will result in a fight, I know), I don't think I will talk to him anymore except when I'm around Hannah. I just can't deal with him anymore. It hurts to much and he isn't the man that raised me. I was realizing recently that I knew it was the end Christmas '07. I knew it wasn't him anymore. Because at Christmas he introduced me to someone as his Step-daughter. When for the past 14 years he had always introduced me as his daughter.
*Sigh*
Well this has turned into a very long/very depressing blog. At least you all have been updated.
Coming Soon: I will be posting a blog about "Famous" People. It should prove ineresting, but considering I have talked so much already I'm going to stop for now.
If anyone has any questions about anything leave me a message/comment and I will get back to you.
Love to all.
Sarai
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