As most of you know my mother lost custody of Hannah to my step-father last month. Today my mother told Wes that she is going to send a letter to the judge letting him have primary custody of Hannah. I understand her reasons, but it still hurts like hell.
Hannah told me last night that she wants to live with me. Which just about tore my heart into pieces. I know this is all really hard on her, but no judge is going to let me have custody when my current situation prevents me from retaining a job. I told her that when I get a job then she can live with me, but I don't think it will happen. I have been trying to prepare myself for this, but I hate it. I hate losing my sister for the second time this year. Not to mention that Wes is supposed to be moving to Pennsylvania so he can keep his job with General Electric (GE).
Not to mention that I'm dealing with going back to Oklahoma and having my Boyfriend and wishing I knew what to do to make this world a better place. I am so fucking frustrated right now. And I feel like I'm letting everyone down. Donnie told me today that I have to learn when to let it go, but I can't let it go. I keep trying, but I can't.
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